"Why do today what you could put of until tomorrow?" -Squidward.
"Yes, but what is today, but yesterday's tomorrow?" -Mr. Krabs.

Who's been there? Sometimes, I'm like Squidward. I just want to lounge around all day, on the couch with my Kindle and my blanket. I'll eat breakfast, then nap, read, and watch Andy Griffith, Looney Tunes, and Tom and Jerry. When 4 o'clock rolls around, I'll panic, jump in the shower, and speed off to class. Then, in true character, I'm late.

Other days, I feel like Krabs. I'll run around the house like Bob the Builder on crack. I'll tackle any chore that needs to be done, do my homework, then shower, and make it to class on time, and even have time to grab a sweet tea.

I'm more often Squidward.
I hate to say it, but it's totally true.
Why, even now I'm in my pajamas, blogging to you when I have Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf? in front of me. I have an article for Anthropology that needs to be read, and a video for the same class that needs to be watched. Mr. Krabs would be all over it.

However, Squidward Quincy Tentacles is at your service.
I'm watching the Today show.
I'm reading Virginia Woolf when it strikes my fancy.
I'm chowing down on Honey Nut Cheerios, handful at a time.
I'm talking to Tyler.
Pinterest is calling my name.
I'm blogging.
I'm about to call Mummy.

I truly am the world's most amazing procrastinator.
But I feel like I do ok.

Everyone says that you can't procrastinate when you get to college.

Ha.

Doorstep Disappointment (Living la Vida Loman)

Here it is, guys! My very first formal essay of the quarter. This one's for my English 203 class. It's a "critical approach to drama." I love it. here, I was asked to examine the relevance of Arthur Miller's Death of a Salesman in today's society, as well as the main character's failures in terms of the American Dream.

Close your eyes. Imagine a tired, weary man, holding his suit case, slumped posture, coming in from a hard day of work and travel, and difficult customers. You can see the exhaustion, pain, and perhaps some disillusion in his eyes. He and his sons are failures, yet his wife loves them to no end. His memories haunt him, to the point at which he speaks to his late brother, he can hear the woman’s laugh, and even see her face. If you could be a fly on the wall of his house, you would never be able to forget what you the sights you see, sounds you hear, and the pain, grief, and guilt you feel. This is exactly what Arthur Miller allows us to do in his everlasting play, Death of Salesman.

            Both June Schlueter and James K. Flanagan agree that “There may well be no character in modern drama more memorable than Willy Loman… It has become a symbol of the pursuer of the American Dream” (“Memorable Willy”). The statement above was made in 1987. However, the view still holds completely true! Even after twenty-five years of change, progress, and development later, we still remember Willy Loman. We remember his failures, his few successes, and through those hunting memories, we can remember his past.

            To understand Willy’s pursuit of the American dream, we must first understand the dream itself. Simply put, it is the thought and belief that life should be richer for everyone, and everyone should have the opportunity to be truly content and happy. This is what Willy Loman wants for his family. This is why he works himself to the bone. This is why Willy unknowingly jeopardizes the peace and structure of his family.

            Everyone wants to own the lovely house with the newest appliances, modern amenities, and the white-washed fence. We want the loving spouse, and adoring honor-roll children. We would love to have the new Chevrolet in the garage, and the success at work. It is the true American dream life. It is what we all want for ourselves.

Willy has good intentions. He is a good man. But he has more than his own fair share of failures. His sons are failures, thus he feels as though he has failed as a father. He cheated on his wife, and has failed as a husband. Not to mention, Willy is in debt to multiple people. He can’t pay his bills, because business is not as good as it used to be. Willy Loman, once a pursuer of the American Dream, has become the American failure.

We first see a glimpse of an issue when Willy comes home early, and his wife Linda immediately fears that he has wrecked the car. While describing his fearful trip to Linda, Willy recounts, “Suddenly I realize I’m goin’ sixty miles an hour, and I don’t remember the last five minutes. I’m – I can’t seem to – keep my mind to it” (Miller 1070). We see here that Willy just is not mentally right. He has a marble or two loose. We begin to think that he just maybe exhausted. However, as we read the play, we can see that something is truly wrong.

Willy: … Wouldn’t that be something? Just swinging there under those branches? Boy, that would be…

(Young Biff and Young Happy appear from the direction Willy was addressing. Happy carries rags and a pail of water. Biff, wearing a sweater with a block “S,” carries a football.) (1074)

We are taken back in time through Willy’s memories. We see that Willy can become completely lost in his memories so much so that he honestly slips away from reality while mid-conversation.

            We are told of tension between Willy and his two sons. After a heated conversation with his son, Biff, Linda reprimands Willy: “You shouldn’t have criticized him, Willy, especially after he just got off the train. You mustn’t lose your temper with him” (1070). Willy goes on to call his oldest son a “lazy bum,” and a “disgrace” (1071). But in the end, we see that the fault all falls on Willy. All of his actions have inadvertent detrimental effects. He has built his sons up so high that they became delusional to their own faults, and were blinded by what little success they had. We see that Willy tries. But his best just is not enough.

            Willy is struggling with his job, as well. With his lack of training, and somewhat “foolish” appearance (1077), Willy is not exactly the salesman that the American people want on their doorsteps. When the play was written in 1949, correspondence courses were just taking off, and were commonplace forms of job training and education. Sadly, Willy neither has the desire to pursue such training, nor the monetary means to do so.

            It is the stress of the painful economy that leads Willy to cheat on his loving Linda while away on business in Boston. The woman is a secretary, of sorts, for buyers that Willy attempts to sell to. She says that she picked Willy to be with, because he is “sweet, and such a kidder.” He has “such a sense of humor,” and they have a good time together. The woman makes Willy feel like the man he is not at home. But simple compliments from Linda send Willy back through time to Boston, and back to the woman’s arms.

             But The Dream is something that has been practically bread into us all, and it is something that we will continue to put into our children. The need of success is at the top of our psychological food pyramid, but that makes it no less important. It is engrained into our DNA, and it is something that has driven every Homo Sapien to ever walk this earth. The relevance of Willy Loman’s quest for happiness and financial freedom in today’s society should not ever come into question.

                        We are all able to relate to one of Willy’s many failures. Perhaps our children are known as late bloomers, and we feel like we let them down as parents. Maybe we have been unfaithful, or even been “the other man/woman.” Or in light of the recent recession, we have lost our jobs, and can no longer be the providers we once were. Though these particular experiences are things we may never go through, the fear, stress, and guilt that each carry along with them. It is still able to pull the heart strings of us all.

            But for Willy, it does more than that. It tears him apart. In the end, Willy realizes his failures, and in an imaginary conversation with his late brother Ben, decides on suicide. Willy has chosen this road before, but has always failed. Now we see why Linda was so afraid that he had wrecked the car again. Willy Climbs in his lovely car (a symbol of his dreams) and speeds down the road only to meet face-to-face with his windshield.

            Willy Loman never saw his dream recognized. He left behind a mourning wife, two lost and wandering sons with no father to guide their paths, and debt that Linda the housewife may never be able to pay off.

            One may think that this projects a grim future for the American dreamers before, among, and ahead of us. And it is completely understandable. The man who gives his all to everything he does fails at every turn. He can’t even grow a garden in his own yard. Nothing he does prospers. His career, marriage, parenthood, and eventually life are all demolished with the ease of an accelerator.

            But there is hope for us in the New World! We can use Willy’s downfalls as inspirations to prevent our own. We can be more realistic about our lives. About our failures, and our fortes. That way, we can be more realistic and accurate while dreaming and scheming. If we know what we are good at, and what we want, we will be more likely to achieve those dreams, and to be not just happy, but truly joyous. Here we are. Twenty-five short years later, and still learning from the Loman’s.

Long Day's Journey Into Movie Night.

"I'm not running away... I'm coming home."
91 (or 93)-year-old Jacob Jankowski.

So after not having a computer for nearly two weeks, and having a malfunctioning computer for two weeks prior, I'm a little behind.
Well ok... Really behind.

Some Things to Know.

• I have a boyfriend. It's wonderful. He's just lovely.
• I've started my second quarter on college. I have some awesome classes.
• Anthropology 101. It's basically a culture study.
• Geography 121. Sort of the same thing, but will have more to do with the way the region we live in affects us.
• English 203. It's "A Critical Approach to Drama". I love it. I love it. I love it.
• Math 113 (again). This time, I have a math-whiz boyfriend, and an awesome professor. Let's hope this goes a little better.

Drama class is completely amazing. We're reading 9 plays written by people considered American modernists. We're starting with "Long Day's Journey Into Night" by Eugene O'Neil. It's super depressing. It's sort of a day in the life of the author's childhood home. The play revolves around Mr. Tyrone, his wife Mary, and their sons Jamie (33), and Edmond (23). Sounds like your typical Failure to Launch situation. Although it's set in 1912, it's no cheery setting. The father is a set-cast actor, who is tired of playing the same role his whole life. Jamie is a failed actor, who has no ambition in life other than to get drunk, annoy his father, and waste all of his sparse income in whore houses. Edmond is the naive youngest son, and happens to have Consumption (TB). Oh yeah... Mary is completely addicted to Morphine, and has been since a rough labor with Edmond.  Not to mention, the three men are alcoholics. Well... Tyrone's is high-functioning, and brags that he's never missed a day of work. Jamie is completely done for, and Edmond is well on his way. It's so gloomy.
But honestly, it's an incredible piece. There is no up-front reference of what Mary is addicted to, only the fact that she consistently becomes more and more removed throughout the day. They constantly pick at each other, and occasionally, a complete fight will break out, and they always mention something from the past. it creates the suspense that such an experimental (for its time, that is) writing needs. Also, we're never given any outside historical references. There's no mention of the current president, the economy, or the Titanic. O'Neil makes it so easy to apply the play to our own lives in hopes that we'll dig up our own ghosts, and finally lay them to rest. It's incredible. I'm so looking forward to this class. =]

So tonight, Ty's coming over for a movie night tonight. Poor boy has never seen Despicable Me, Tangled, or Water for Elephants. Poor boy... But all we can do is pray. And have movie night. Well.. he's here, and Mummy is harping at me to quit blogging, so I suppose I'll post again later.

Btw... How cute is that word play in the title?! Because I had a terrible day at work, but we won't go into that. People are just rude, and think that just because I take their food orders, they can boss me around for other things, and be just completely awful. So it's been a long day.